So it was one year ago today, January 31st, that I drove off into the winter sunset of the Michigan country-side totally unaware of how my life would change in the coming two weeks, and six months.
Only now, 365 days later, am I starting to be able to accept that-that part of my life is over and begin to move on. Only now can I begin to piece things together without being rendered numb with pain. I am only now being able to put my life into another gear and dimension. I still have numerous questions un-answered, and some severely raw emotional wounds. Time will heal and answer those questions. I have since met some of the most amazing people who have helped me through these last 12 months.
I have no regrets, as the last 5.5 years have been one of the most amazing and unforgettable periods in my life. I had an unmatched best-friend for 4.5 of them, and she will be sorely missed. Things change, and apparently so do people. This I learned on Valentines Day 2010. This is where I think I mentally checked-out for at least a few months just so I could function at work "normally". It've been one half-decade learning experience for me that I will never forget.
I still care about her immensely and wish her nothing but success and happiness in her future. She's worked so hard, she deserves all she gets. Life however is a funny thing. People change and blind-side you, even when you supposedly "saw it coming". It can change your perception of them completely and harshly thrusts you into a new dimension of failure. Failure is not something I deal well with at all. Hence, the year-long grievance process. Healing, and moving on, come with time. Time is starting to shine a warmer, happier beam of light on me lately. This is a sign of positive changes possibly brewing in the future.
She owns a piece of my heart forever. Even though she would never admit it, I think I may be somewhere deep, deep inside of her's...hidden somewhere.
God Bless, and God Speed-Good night and good luck.